Potentially Useful Skills: A Follow-Up
My Mom always says, “Half of being smart is knowing what you’re dumb at.”
How true.
And the older I get, the smarter Mom gets, of course. Maybe it’s just that as we mature, we realize that our parents actually do know what they’re talking about. They do have all that experience they lay claim to and they actually have learned from it. Perhaps it is that as we mature, we realize that we don’t actually know as much as our younger selves believed. Maybe it’s a combination. If what Mom said is true, maybe as we grow, we are smart enough to realize that we simply don’t know it all. Nor should we.
In homage to Mom’s wisdom, I submit my list of ten things I’m “dumb at” and do not know how to do.
1. Change a tire. And I really think I should. What I do know how to do is call AAA and get them to do it for me. At least there’s that. But it seems much more self-sufficient and potentially safer to be able to solve the problem and move on than to have to sit waiting for emergency road service.
2. Play the piano. Once upon a time, I took piano lessons, but I hated to practice. I remember vividly the day I stopped taking lessons… It was raining, but it was one of those lovely and delicious rainy spring days that made everything seem fresh, green, and new. The teacher’s front yard gardens on that day were as lush as I had ever seen. As I reached for the doorknob of his house, I knew I could not go in. I was unprepared and simply could not face the man and tell him so. I ran back to the car where Mom was waiting, tears mixing with the raindrops on my face. She went inside to talk to him while I waited, surrounded by the intense cleanness of the yard. I still don’t know exactly what they talked about, but when Mom came back outside, I was no longer a piano student. I really don’t hold on to regrets in life – every choice, every action in life, makes us the person we are at this moment. Change one thing and life is a whole different story. Seems good in theory, but likely not in practice. Anyway, if I have one thing that might qualify as a legitimate regret, it’s that I did not continue to play the piano.
3. Build a computer. I’m married to a man who can, though, so I think I may be covered by proxy on this one.
4. Speak a foreign language. Other than inquiring as to the location of the toilets in French or tossing around the nine Spanish words I’ve picked up from Dora the Explorer, I speak only my native tongue. I am seriously considering changing this, though, and grabbing a copy of a program that will teach me conversational Latin. I think we should bring it back.
5. Make oregano-teriyaki chicken. This is the Fab Hub’s signature meal. I do not know how to make it. Don’t want to, either. Moving on.
6. Fold a fitted sheet properly. Let’s be honest about this one, though – no one really know how to do this properly.
7. Quiet my mind. I have something happening in my brain pretty much all the time. I find it nearly impossible to quiet my mind and think of nothing. I am serious; I really do not know how to clear my mind and just relax. It’s on my list, though, of things to learn.
8. Stop second-guessing myself. I second-guess myself all the time. Often, it translates to a seeming inability to make a decision. It’s not that I can’t make a decision; it’s that sometimes often I wonder if my instinct was right. Lately, this happens most often in cooking. Case in point: The other night we made fish tacos (amazing, by the way, and I will have to post the recipe). The recipe called for one and a half pounds of fish to produce two to three servings. I was certain that adding another half pound would be perfect to accommodate another two people. When I looked at two pounds of cod on my counter, though, it seemed excessive. My gut told me to freeze some of it for another day and stick to a smaller amount of fish. At the last minute, though, I panicked that it would be too little to satisfy everyone and made the whole two pounds. Two pounds of cod for fish tacos is a LOT of fish, by the way. Still trying to figure out what to do with the leftovers.
9. Go to bed at a reasonable time. I am a terrible insomniac. Some of it is a plain and simply physiological fact. Some of it is self-induced. Whatever the variety, I have a distinct inability to prepare myself for bed in such a manner or at such a time as to achieve a full night of quality sleep. The upshot of this is that I can tell you pretty much anything you want to know about late night infomercials or sitcom reruns. I have also said a gargantuan number of Hail Mary’s and have counted enough sheep to open a sweater factory.
10. Resist a list or a quiz. If there is a quiz to be taken or a list to be made, I am generally equal to the task. I either find it highly entertaining or have mastered the fine art of avoiding some other task like learning how to change a tire or speak French.
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Fold a fitted sheet?! pffeff! Girl, please! I wash those suckers, roll them in a ball, and shove them on a shelf in the linen closet. Inevitable someone’s going to drag them out to build a fort with and even if they don’t, when I’m ready to use them I stretch them out across the bed and cover them with a comforter and no one will know that earlier it was a wrinkled wad in a dark closet. And if they do, well that means my mother-in-law is in town and needs to get out my closets else she find something she would rather not!? LOL!
OMG I can’t stop laughing – too funny, Jennifer! Thanks for visiting and commenting. 🙂
OMG! We must have had the same teacher. Why bother when they fit perfectly well on the shelf when rolled in a ball? If you are taking the time to search my linen closet, you are the one with problems. Not me!
Well, my teacher was great. I, however, simply can’t (or won’t…or didn’t) master the art.
i also listed that i can’t change a flat tire or speak a foreign language. and i sure can’t fold a fitted sheet properly! although i do know one person who is a master, so those people do exist 🙂
They do indeed! My Mom is one of them. Apparently, Martha Stewart is another. Thanks for coming by, Jen! 🙂
Number 7 has become important to me over the past year. It has helped me sleep better at night and avoid the non-stop hamster wheel of random thoughts and ideas that were keeping me awake for hours. Want to know what finally helped? I tried yoga. I’ve done a yoga routine maybe 3 times in the past 3 months, so this isn’t really a pro-yoga comment. HOWEVER, what learned is the breathing/relaxation routine at the end of the beginner’s yoga video. The whole breathe in, hold the breath so many counts, breath out, hold that so many counts, etc… it puts me to sleep every single time and prevents my mind from flying around a million different ways.
OK, I’m going to start trying it. Meanwhile, I am fascinated by the idea of yoga. Tried it a couple of months ago and fell flat on my face, then my tuchus. First and last attempt. Breathing, though, I may be able to do. 😉
🙂 I have a similar problem with yoga: I can’t stop giggling at myself. That’s why I had to switch to Jazzercise. At least there, laughing at yourself is required. Oh and it’s a great workout. But yes, the yoga breathing techniques are indeed useful.
See that’s what I need – someplace I can laugh at myself on purpose. Oh, wait, I do that all the time…
I am so with you on the fitted sheets! Every time one comes out of the dryer I make a haphazard attempt at folding it and it always looks like a bundled wad when I am done. I also always think about when I saw Martha Stewart fold one perfectly on television and think, “I am so glad that I really don’t care about this too much.” Striving for excellence in this case would just drive me insane, I’m sure.
Of course she did! But she probably has people to do that for her. My Mom can actually fold a fitted sheet and despite her efforts to educate me in this area, I have yet to master it.
Number 6 is a trick! There is no way to properly fold a fitted sheet.
I think they should be crammed into vases as a new decorative trend!
Now that’s an idea! Thanks for visiting, Tammi! 🙂
ARGH! Fitted Sheets! Those buggers. Never have been able to fold them and now don’t even try.
I have given up. I’m deciding there are other more pressing skills I need to tackle.
I was going to write about fitted sheets and Martha Stewart too, but since that topic has been covered already, I’ll just say: great post. Except changing your own tires is overrated. AAA employees need something to do besides hand out maps all day, don’t they?
I agree. I feel that it is my obligation to keep AAA in business. One year I called them to get my keys out of my car four times. Four. Oh, and each time they did…the car was running the whole time.
Fitted sheets are pure evil! As for the piano, I played as a kid, hated practicing and gave up as a result. Is there a lesson in all this? Ehh, who cares??
Still trying to figure out why fitted sheets are such a great thing. They do NOT stay fitted/tucked on the bed at all. Doesn’t matter what quality of sheet or elastic, mine always pop off. Of course, when the Fab Hub puts the sheets on the bed, that doesn’t happen. Hmm. I may never do the sheet changing again.
Oh, I have so many comments! First, your mom’s wisdom is so right on the money.
Now, for your 10 things…
1. I can change a tire, but I can also call a service station. Long as I can make the call, that is what I will do.
2. It is not too late for this one. Once the empty nest years arrive, it will be a great way to combat dementia.
3. Way to marry well!
4. I may have two kids studying in Paris this fall if all goes well. I am going to attempt to use tapes and learn just a little French this summer.
5. Leaving well enough alone is wisdom.
6. Yeah
7. You have to be male to quiet your mind completely.
8. Here I sigh, because I too would be moving the cod back and forth from the refrigerator.
9. Yup, not gonna happen for me either.
10. It can even be a ridiculous quiz…..saw one the other day—what animal are you?
May, best list comment ever! Loved #3 – I did indeed marry well. Had to laugh at #5 because…well, consider the name of the recipe and what else can you do? (Love you, Hub!) When I hit #7, however, I almost fell off the chair I was laughing so hard. I’m pretty sure the reason is a subject for another post! 🙂
Loved your list! I can’t change a tire either. Or drive a manual transmission. If I had done this prompt, I probably would have had to expand it to 100 items!
Thanks, Paula. I actually can drive manual transmission. I hate that my current car is automatic. Should’ve put that on my can do list. Glad you came by!
‘The older I get the smarter mom gets’ boy. Ain’t that the truth!
Certainly is! Thanks for coming by, Court! 🙂
Still think your mom’s line is the best. Folding a fitted sheet is not easy, but also not a skill you would have put on a t-shirt or anything. Building computers and car maintenance, maybe.
I think it’s my favorite Mom-ism of all.
6,7 and 8 are all things I agree with. I need to become more decisive and maybe that’s exactly the reason. Once I make a decision, I start second guessing it. And fold a fitted sheet. Ha.
It seems that no one knows how to fold a sheet except my Mom and Martha Stewart. And apparently, the rest of us don’t care. Thanks for coming by, Jamie! 🙂
I take it as a sign of maturing that you start to realize you don’t know as much as you think you do. When I was younger, I thought I knew how the world worked. I thought I knew what was important. Now that I’m older, I realize that’s not true. Perhaps that comes with wisdom whether it’s your mom’s wisdom or your own.
Anyway, I think it’s perfectly fine if you don’t know how to change a tire. I’ve tried it twice. The first time I did it great and put on the spare and drove it to a repair place. The second time, the support gave out and the car almost landed on my hand. So…yeah…I’m getting AAA if it happens again.
Maybe it’s that as we get older and/or more mature, we realize that we still have room to grow. There is so much to learn and the only way to do that, to improve upon the person we already are, is to be open to what is still ahead of us.
It is my first time on your site. And the first post (which is this) has already gotten me laughing! What a wonderful tribute to your mother!
I can’t change a flat tire or fix my computer too. I also face issues getting my TV switched on at times. Blame it on my husband who made the set-up too complex for me to understand! Then again, my kids have had no issues getting it switched on though!
Hi, Evelyn and welcome! Glad you enjoyed the post! Hope you’ll come back and read again. 🙂
It’s amazing how easily kids adapt to using complicated (or not so complicated) technology. They’re growing up a whole diffrent way than we did, for sure! 🙂
I do know how to fold a fitted sheet, although none of the tutorials I saw in a quick Google search are the ones I use. This one made me chuckle: http://thedoghousediaries.com/4491
I cannot build a computer or man the grill. Both fall into Hubster’s area of expertise and I have no desire to learn.
Fab Hub is the grillmaster here, too. I figure as long as that man can make a perfect steak or grill pretty much whatever I hand out the door to him, I’m covered.
GREAT tutorial – cracked me up. 🙂